And so we come to the last days skiing and once again its clear blue skies and sunshine. After breakfast we head up Pied Moutet for the last time, and decide to do a few runs over here, unfortunately we are somewhat limited as the most of the snow has now disappeared and many runs are closed. So after a short while we are making our way back over to the main resort side and up to the glacier. At the glacier we have a final blast down Signal, get the chair back up and then catch the funicular to the top of the glacier.
Once at the top we head over to the snow park for a few small jumps, and this time we all stay upright! After all surviving the jumps we make the long run down to La Fee and carry on to the Thuit chair which brings up back up to the Diable gondola. Then it’s up the Super Diable chair and down to the Panoramic restaurant at Toura where the plan is to meet up with most of the club for lunch. Unfortunately the queue for food is all the way down the stairs and virtually out the door, and to make things worse the toilets are also out of order. And to compound things even more the restaurant had the effrontery to put up a sign basically blaming their customers for the toilets not being in use.
Now anybody who is familiar with French toilets will know that they are not built or maintained to a very high standard. In fact I am convince that somewhere in France is a shop called ‘Crap-sanitary-fittings-r-us’, where most of the mountain restaurants go to buy their toilet fixtures and fittings, because they are cheap and rubbish! So is it any wonder that they break so readily.
Anyway we did not fancy queuing for ages for food and were also desperate for some bladder relief so we headed off back down to the restaurant at Les Crètes. Thankfully their facilities were working, but obviously as operational toilets on the mountain were now at a premium, there was a queue! But the relief was worth the wait.
After a pretty basic lunch most of us used the facilities for a second time in the hope we would not get caught short again, as it is quite difficult to ski with your legs crossed. Feeling suitable refreshed and comfortable we headed back up to the glacier for the last time. After a couple of high speed runs down the glacier we then make our way over to the main snowpark area above Toura and have a go on the boarder cross and free cross runs, as these were probably the only runs we hadn’t actually skied yet.
The boarder cross was great fun with some good air to be had in one or two places, the free cross was more like a giant slalom course without the gates. You could get some good speed up carving round the turns, but if you caught someone up you had to sit behind them as attempting to overtake would surely end in disaster for one or probably both of you.
Once we had completed these runs and with the sense of achievement of having skied all there was to ski we decided to start make our way back to the hotel. On arriving back down at Les Crètes again the others were of the opinion that the black run Valatin would be so bad now that they were not going to attempt it and opted to go back down in the gondola. I however, being made of sterner stuff and probably more stupid, was not going to be put off. You can not finish your skiing holiday by getting a lift down to the resort so I headed off for the run. And I can tell you now it was no more difficult than it had been all week, so more fool them I thought as I reached the bottom and made my way to the hire shop to return my skis. So with a slight tinge of sadness and a little tear in my eye I handed my skis back and returned to the hotel. Surely this cant be the end already?
Monday 30 April 2007
Tuesday 17 April 2007
Make 'Em Laugh!
The evening meal on Thursday was quite a hasty affair as most of us had tickets for the Comedy night being held in the Secrets Bar, and we had been told we needed to be in our seats by 9 pm. So by about this time a few of us had made it to the bar and set about occupying as many seats as possible by placing jackets, hats, scarves and gloves on very available spare chair and stool. In fact, by the time we had finished our section of the bar was very reminiscent of an Ibiza hotel poolside that had been invaded by Germans! Within a few minutes the AOAC made up a large portion of the audience as we waited for the show to begin.
At the scheduled time for the show to begin the owner of the bar came up to the mike to announce that the first act would not be on for another half an hour, in the meantime however there was a chance for people to win some free beer if they would come up and try to make us all laugh. Several brave souls did venture up and tell some fairly lame jokes from what I can recall. I think that a member from the club did in fact go up, but for the life of me I cannot remember who. So if it was you, I can only apologies for not giving you credit for your moment of glory.
Eventually the proper comedy began, when I found out who was actually appearing I was quite surprised, for an entrance fee of only €5 I had expected to see some unknown amateurs, but the acts were 2 top stand up comics. They were Dave Fulton, whose humour I was not familiar with but his name certainly rang a bell, and the main act was Marcus Brigstocke, who has been on TV many times and whose comedy I have always enjoyed. As it turned out the 2 guys were doing a tour of French ski resorts and had just travelled up from Chamonix.
First up was Dave Fulton, a scruffy American who was happy to take the p**s out of himself and his fellow countryman, in particular George ‘Dubb’U’, just as much as he was taking the p**s out of us Brits. In particular his anecdotes about coming to terms with British drinking culture were very funny. Also his observations on French hotels certainly hit the mark with us, as he was also staying in what was supposed to be a 3 star hotel. As he pointed out, judging by the standard of his hotel, the French star rating must go up to 12. But if he leaned far enough out of his hotel room window he had a really good view of the hotel he wanted to be in.
The main act was Marcus Brigstocke, who in fact started his comedy career at Bristol University, so once he discovered that quite a lot of the audience were from the Bristol area, he was provided with some additional humorous material, and the fact that there were some snow bladders amongst us also gave him plenty to go on about. He pointed out it was time for skiers and snow boarders to unite against snow bladers, because skiing and snow boarder is supposed to hurt. And I quite agree. Snow boarding hurts, especially when you come into contact with an inanimate object like a T-Bar pylon, just ask Andy Ogbourne, and skiing hurts, especially when you come into contact with an inarticulate object like a snow boarder, just ask Karen and Gary. Whereas snow blading is a doddle, it’s like walking around in your slippers! As Marcus said, it is so easy you can drive your car in snow blades.
All in all the 2 guys were both really funny and excellent value. Once the comedy was over people started to drift off back to the hotel to get some sleep before our final days skiing. It was hard to believe that the week was nearly over already.
At the scheduled time for the show to begin the owner of the bar came up to the mike to announce that the first act would not be on for another half an hour, in the meantime however there was a chance for people to win some free beer if they would come up and try to make us all laugh. Several brave souls did venture up and tell some fairly lame jokes from what I can recall. I think that a member from the club did in fact go up, but for the life of me I cannot remember who. So if it was you, I can only apologies for not giving you credit for your moment of glory.
Eventually the proper comedy began, when I found out who was actually appearing I was quite surprised, for an entrance fee of only €5 I had expected to see some unknown amateurs, but the acts were 2 top stand up comics. They were Dave Fulton, whose humour I was not familiar with but his name certainly rang a bell, and the main act was Marcus Brigstocke, who has been on TV many times and whose comedy I have always enjoyed. As it turned out the 2 guys were doing a tour of French ski resorts and had just travelled up from Chamonix.
First up was Dave Fulton, a scruffy American who was happy to take the p**s out of himself and his fellow countryman, in particular George ‘Dubb’U’, just as much as he was taking the p**s out of us Brits. In particular his anecdotes about coming to terms with British drinking culture were very funny. Also his observations on French hotels certainly hit the mark with us, as he was also staying in what was supposed to be a 3 star hotel. As he pointed out, judging by the standard of his hotel, the French star rating must go up to 12. But if he leaned far enough out of his hotel room window he had a really good view of the hotel he wanted to be in.
The main act was Marcus Brigstocke, who in fact started his comedy career at Bristol University, so once he discovered that quite a lot of the audience were from the Bristol area, he was provided with some additional humorous material, and the fact that there were some snow bladders amongst us also gave him plenty to go on about. He pointed out it was time for skiers and snow boarders to unite against snow bladers, because skiing and snow boarder is supposed to hurt. And I quite agree. Snow boarding hurts, especially when you come into contact with an inanimate object like a T-Bar pylon, just ask Andy Ogbourne, and skiing hurts, especially when you come into contact with an inarticulate object like a snow boarder, just ask Karen and Gary. Whereas snow blading is a doddle, it’s like walking around in your slippers! As Marcus said, it is so easy you can drive your car in snow blades.
All in all the 2 guys were both really funny and excellent value. Once the comedy was over people started to drift off back to the hotel to get some sleep before our final days skiing. It was hard to believe that the week was nearly over already.
Friday 13 April 2007
La Grave
Thursday started a little earlier, as the plan was to get on the first lifts at 9 o’clock in order to get to the glacier as soon as possible so that we could make the trek over to La Grave. It was a bit of a shock to the system to be one of the first ones down for breakfast and sit in an almost deserted dining room, but slowly the room began to fill, and a few us, who were feeling a bit blurry eyed, started pondering on whether getting up early was such a good idea. No matter, just after 9 we were outside and making our way to the lift.
Today we decided to take the Diable gondola as it was thought this would be the quicker route, unfortunately it looked as if the rest of the skiers in the resort had thought the same and we were met by a queue of immense proportions, and worst still it wasn’t moving! However, it was pointed out that no one was actually going up yet, and the only things in the gondolas where supplies for the restaurant at the top. God these French are so on the ball and on top of the game! A few minutes later people started appearing in the bubbles and the queue slowly shuffled forward a la Post Office style, as we snaked up to the steps into the lift station, then snaked all the way down one side and all the way back up the other.
After about 10 to 15 minutes we were in a bubble and making our accent. At the top of the bubble we took the Super Diable chair rather than head for the second stage of the gondola or cable car. From the chair we made our way down to the 8 man chair which takes you up to the base of the glacier. Then up the glacier on the T-bar, followed by a bit of a flat schuss and a walk to the last T-bar. The final stage of the climb is completed by a drag lift with a difference. Here you hang on to a rope and get pulled along behind a piste basher, which is quite an enjoyable novelty. There is however a knack to this ‘lift’ and that is to be as near to the back of the rope as possible, rather than the front where you are right behind the piste basher and get covered in the snow it is churning up. When we disembarked the tow rope we are now at a height of just under 3600m or over 11,000 feet in old money.
Now the adventure began with the long decent down to La Grave. For some of our large group this was old hat, as they had already skied down earlier in the week. For the rest of us this was a step into the unknown.
The first part was quite straight forward as this is a pisted blue run that takes you down to the restaurant at the top of the lift from La Grave. Once at the lift station a much needed comfort break was required by most. The toilets here were quite interesting, as it would appear your bodily waste is just deposited somewhere in the open down the mountain! Which is supposedly environmentally friendly. Also there is a sign in quite graphic English telling you to make sure your aim is good.
This was followed by the obligatory hot chocolate break at the restaurant which also provided a good photo opportunity for many of us. With hot chocolate drunk and cameras put away it was now time for the real fun to start.
Just a short distance from the restaurant you come to the first fairly steep mogul field, which is a bit torturous to get into. After negotiating this you ski down a little further to an even steeper and narrow gully which again is full of moguls. It’s a case of side slipping and stepping your way down in places. But it’s all good fun, as the snow is excellent at this height and the surrounding scenery, if you are able to take your eyes off what your skis are doing and look, is quite stunning.
At the bottom of the gully our little group pauses for a bit of a breather, only to realise that everyone else has headed off and are no where in sight. And as there is no piste there are definitely no signs, and none of us have been here before we are not to sure of which way to go. Anyway we set off in what would appear to be the obvious direction, which is of course down. Eventually we spot some of the others in the distance and start making our way over to them.
They have stopped near the top of a ridge and I assume they are just pausing before descending again, however just as I get to the ridge I realise they are in fact turning back as this is obviously not the way down as it is a sheer drop down through the trees. Still once again the view from here is really spectacular and was well worth the extra effort involved. I then turn around and rejoin the others who had wisely decided not to expend the extra energy and follow me.
From here the terrain does start to flatten out a bit, but skiing is still quite challenging as we make our way down numerous gullies and narrow channels. We do start seeing small signs attached to trees pointing in the general direction of La Grave but the snow is now starting to get very thin in places and rocks and tree roots are proving the greater obstacles on the decent. We then come across a group of snow boarders who have obviously been brought down here by an instructor. Most of the group are sat down taking a break, but when the last guy eventually joins them, he takes off his board and hurls it in to the trees and starts muttering digruntledly (if there is such a word) to himself. He probably wishes he had stuck to skis!
Leaving the happy boarder behind, we carry on picking our way through the trees until the snow just literally runs out. So it’s off with the skis and a walk back out into the open where there is some snow on the ground. We then do the final bit of skiing of our decent and arrive at the mid station on the La Grave lift. We board the lift to make our way down to La Grave, but our fun and games haven’t quite finished, as we get on to the lift Karen manages to whack her head on the door frame and at the bottom I manage to trip over Rachel’s ski poles and stumble out of the lift with arms and legs flaying in all directions, but I somehow stay upright, which is quite a feat when you are wearing ski boots on a smooth concrete floor, anyway the others all found it very amusing.
Once outside the lift station we take in the ambiance that is La Grave which is a pretty little place, but it would appear that the whole village is asleep as there is nobody about, or cars driving around, just a dog barking in the distance. So with all this excitement proving to much we call a taxi to take us back to Les Deux Alpes.
After about half an hour, following a drive down into the valley and back up again through the cloud that has formed just below the resort. We are back at the chair lift at the far end of the resort that takes up to the Pied Moutet and our favourite restaurant, La Kanata. We board the chair and head up over the field where there is still only one horse! Where his companion is from earlier in the week will always remain a mystery. But the meat we had in the hotel on a previous night was certainly suspect!
Once at the top we swiftly head for the restaurant and greet the proprietor like a long lost friend. We settle down by the fire and tuck in to another great meal. Several of us opt for the Plat du jour, which is a type of tarteflette with crusty bread on top, and Rachel has another huge portion of mussels. This is all washed down with a beer or two and the mandatory glass of fiery genepi.
Having finished our by now rather late lunch and with that satisfying inner glow, we said our farewells and started to make our way back to the hotel. So ended another great days skiing. We hadn’t covered a lot of miles, but the experience of being out in the wilderness away from the crowds, the piste and the lifts is one not to be missed. It is definitely something I would do again if I ever return to Les Deux Alpes.
Today we decided to take the Diable gondola as it was thought this would be the quicker route, unfortunately it looked as if the rest of the skiers in the resort had thought the same and we were met by a queue of immense proportions, and worst still it wasn’t moving! However, it was pointed out that no one was actually going up yet, and the only things in the gondolas where supplies for the restaurant at the top. God these French are so on the ball and on top of the game! A few minutes later people started appearing in the bubbles and the queue slowly shuffled forward a la Post Office style, as we snaked up to the steps into the lift station, then snaked all the way down one side and all the way back up the other.
After about 10 to 15 minutes we were in a bubble and making our accent. At the top of the bubble we took the Super Diable chair rather than head for the second stage of the gondola or cable car. From the chair we made our way down to the 8 man chair which takes you up to the base of the glacier. Then up the glacier on the T-bar, followed by a bit of a flat schuss and a walk to the last T-bar. The final stage of the climb is completed by a drag lift with a difference. Here you hang on to a rope and get pulled along behind a piste basher, which is quite an enjoyable novelty. There is however a knack to this ‘lift’ and that is to be as near to the back of the rope as possible, rather than the front where you are right behind the piste basher and get covered in the snow it is churning up. When we disembarked the tow rope we are now at a height of just under 3600m or over 11,000 feet in old money.
Now the adventure began with the long decent down to La Grave. For some of our large group this was old hat, as they had already skied down earlier in the week. For the rest of us this was a step into the unknown.
The first part was quite straight forward as this is a pisted blue run that takes you down to the restaurant at the top of the lift from La Grave. Once at the lift station a much needed comfort break was required by most. The toilets here were quite interesting, as it would appear your bodily waste is just deposited somewhere in the open down the mountain! Which is supposedly environmentally friendly. Also there is a sign in quite graphic English telling you to make sure your aim is good.
This was followed by the obligatory hot chocolate break at the restaurant which also provided a good photo opportunity for many of us. With hot chocolate drunk and cameras put away it was now time for the real fun to start.
Just a short distance from the restaurant you come to the first fairly steep mogul field, which is a bit torturous to get into. After negotiating this you ski down a little further to an even steeper and narrow gully which again is full of moguls. It’s a case of side slipping and stepping your way down in places. But it’s all good fun, as the snow is excellent at this height and the surrounding scenery, if you are able to take your eyes off what your skis are doing and look, is quite stunning.
At the bottom of the gully our little group pauses for a bit of a breather, only to realise that everyone else has headed off and are no where in sight. And as there is no piste there are definitely no signs, and none of us have been here before we are not to sure of which way to go. Anyway we set off in what would appear to be the obvious direction, which is of course down. Eventually we spot some of the others in the distance and start making our way over to them.
They have stopped near the top of a ridge and I assume they are just pausing before descending again, however just as I get to the ridge I realise they are in fact turning back as this is obviously not the way down as it is a sheer drop down through the trees. Still once again the view from here is really spectacular and was well worth the extra effort involved. I then turn around and rejoin the others who had wisely decided not to expend the extra energy and follow me.
From here the terrain does start to flatten out a bit, but skiing is still quite challenging as we make our way down numerous gullies and narrow channels. We do start seeing small signs attached to trees pointing in the general direction of La Grave but the snow is now starting to get very thin in places and rocks and tree roots are proving the greater obstacles on the decent. We then come across a group of snow boarders who have obviously been brought down here by an instructor. Most of the group are sat down taking a break, but when the last guy eventually joins them, he takes off his board and hurls it in to the trees and starts muttering digruntledly (if there is such a word) to himself. He probably wishes he had stuck to skis!
Leaving the happy boarder behind, we carry on picking our way through the trees until the snow just literally runs out. So it’s off with the skis and a walk back out into the open where there is some snow on the ground. We then do the final bit of skiing of our decent and arrive at the mid station on the La Grave lift. We board the lift to make our way down to La Grave, but our fun and games haven’t quite finished, as we get on to the lift Karen manages to whack her head on the door frame and at the bottom I manage to trip over Rachel’s ski poles and stumble out of the lift with arms and legs flaying in all directions, but I somehow stay upright, which is quite a feat when you are wearing ski boots on a smooth concrete floor, anyway the others all found it very amusing.
Once outside the lift station we take in the ambiance that is La Grave which is a pretty little place, but it would appear that the whole village is asleep as there is nobody about, or cars driving around, just a dog barking in the distance. So with all this excitement proving to much we call a taxi to take us back to Les Deux Alpes.
After about half an hour, following a drive down into the valley and back up again through the cloud that has formed just below the resort. We are back at the chair lift at the far end of the resort that takes up to the Pied Moutet and our favourite restaurant, La Kanata. We board the chair and head up over the field where there is still only one horse! Where his companion is from earlier in the week will always remain a mystery. But the meat we had in the hotel on a previous night was certainly suspect!
Once at the top we swiftly head for the restaurant and greet the proprietor like a long lost friend. We settle down by the fire and tuck in to another great meal. Several of us opt for the Plat du jour, which is a type of tarteflette with crusty bread on top, and Rachel has another huge portion of mussels. This is all washed down with a beer or two and the mandatory glass of fiery genepi.
Having finished our by now rather late lunch and with that satisfying inner glow, we said our farewells and started to make our way back to the hotel. So ended another great days skiing. We hadn’t covered a lot of miles, but the experience of being out in the wilderness away from the crowds, the piste and the lifts is one not to be missed. It is definitely something I would do again if I ever return to Les Deux Alpes.
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